14 Wedding Reception Regrets From Couples (How To Avoid)
In this post, you will hear the top 15 wedding reception regrets from real couples who have recently had their wedding.
I talked to some of my past couples and searched through dozens of wedding forums and Facebook groups.
Here are the reception regrets that were mentioned the most, and more importantly, what you can do to avoid them at your wedding.
1. Not Staying True To Yourself
Many of the couples who had regrets about their wedding reception regretted not being true to themselves on their wedding day.
It’s so easy to feel pressure from family or tradition, but your wedding should reflect your style and personality. Here’s how to avoid this regret:
Tips For Staying True To Yourself:
- Choose what makes you happy: Whether it’s your dress, decor, or ceremony style, make choices that feel right for you. Don’t pick things just because others expect them.
- Limit guest list pressure: It’s okay to have a smaller wedding if that feels better for you. Invite the people who matter most.
- Skip traditions you don’t like: If something doesn’t feel like “you,” don’t do it! You don’t have to toss the bouquet, do a first dance, or cut a cake if it’s not your style.
- Have a wedding that fits your personality: Whether you want a big party or a small, intimate day, plan the wedding that fits your personality.
- Trust your gut: When making decisions, go with what feels right. If something doesn’t sit well with you, it’s okay to say no.
By staying true to yourself, you’ll have fewer regrets and enjoy your special day more!
2. Not Hiring Professional Hair and Makeup Artists
Some brides regret not hiring a professional for hair and makeup. Your wedding day photos last a lifetime, so it’s important to look and feel your best. Here’s how to avoid this regret:
Tips To Avoid Any Hair and Makeup Regrets:
- Hire a pro if you can: A professional mua knows how to make your makeup last all day and look great in photos. They also know how to style hair that will stay in place from the ceremony through the reception.
- Do a trial run: If you can’t afford a pro, practice your look a few times before the wedding. This way, you’ll feel confident on the big day.
- Go for long-lasting products: Use high-quality makeup and hair products designed to last. This will keep you looking fresh all day and night.
- Don’t try a new look on the day: Stick with a style you feel comfortable with. The wedding day is not the time to try something new. If you do want something new, try it out a few days before the wedding.
- Plan extra time: Whether you’re doing it yourself or using a professional, make sure you have enough time to get ready without rushing.
By planning ahead for hair and makeup, you’ll feel and look your best all day!
3. Not Hiring A Day-Of Coordinator
Many couples regret not having someone to manage the little details on their wedding day. Without a coordinator, things can get chaotic, and you may feel stressed or overwhelmed. Here’s how to avoid this regret:
Tips To Avoid Day-Of Stress:
- Hire a day-of coordinator: If it’s in your budget, a coordinator can handle all the details and keep everything on track. This allows you to relax and enjoy your day.
- Delegate to a trusted person: If you can’t afford a coordinator, ask a reliable friend or family member to manage the timeline and handle any issues that come up.
- Use your vendors for help: Ask your photographer or DJ to help guide the day. They often assist with the flow of the event (ask in advance if this is something they can help with. Don’t surprise them on the wedding day).
- Create a detailed timeline: Write out a clear schedule for the day. Share it with your wedding party, vendors, and anyone helping out.
- Prepare for the unexpected: Have someone ready to handle last-minute issues, so you don’t get overwhelmed or stressed.
With the help of a coordinator or trusted family member/friend, you can focus on enjoying your wedding without worrying about the details!
4. Not Spending Enough Time With Your Guests
Many couples regret not spending enough time with their guests. It can be easy to get caught up in the day and miss out on talking with the people who came to celebrate. Here’s how to avoid this regret:
Tips to Spend Time with Your Guests:
- Visit each table: After dinner, go around with your photographer to greet each table. This allows you to see everyone and get a photo with them.
- Skip the receiving line: It takes a long time and can be tiring (and you only get a few seconds of face time). Instead, visit tables during the reception or walk around during cocktail hour.
- Plan enough time in your schedule: Make sure your timeline allows for mingling with guests without rushing.
- Stay on the dance floor: Encourage guests to join you on the dance floor. It’s a fun way to interact with your friends and family all at once.
By making time to greet your guests, you’ll feel more connected and avoid missing out on spending time with loved ones!
5. Not Taking Time to Eat
A lot of couples regret not eating during their wedding reception. With all the excitement, it’s easy to forget, but you’ll need the energy to enjoy the rest of the night (and that food wasn’t cheap). Here’s how to avoid this regret:
Tips to Make Sure You Eat:
- Eat during dinner: Prioritize eating when the meal is served. Don’t let conversations pull you away from your plate.
- Ask someone to remind you: Have a bridesmaid or family member check in to make sure you’ve eaten enough.
- Take time for snacks: Set aside some appetizers or snacks for you and your partner to enjoy before or after dinner.
- Stay hydrated: In addition to food, make sure you’re drinking water throughout the day to avoid dehydration.
By making time to eat, you’ll have the energy you need to fully enjoy your wedding day!
6. Not Giving The DJ Enough Input On Music
Some couples regret not providing their DJ with enough guidance on what songs they wanted…or didn’t want…played at their reception. Music sets the tone for your reception, so it’s important to give some input. Here’s how to avoid this regret:
Tips to Ensure the Right Music is Played:
- Create a do-not-play list: Tell your DJ which songs or genres you don’t want at your reception to avoid unwanted surprises (you know your family and friends best).
- Ask guests for song suggestions: Before the wedding, ask guests for their top 3 favorite reception songs. Use their suggestions to build a request list for the DJ.
- Highlight must-play songs: Choose a few must-play songs for special moments, like your first dance, cake cutting, or last song of the night.
- Mix it up: Ensure a balance between crowd-pleasers and songs that you personally love. This will keep both you and your guests happy.
- Communicate your vibe: Let your DJ know the kind of atmosphere you want (e.g., upbeat, romantic, or laid-back) so they can tailor the playlist to match your vision.
By giving your DJ clear input, you’ll set the perfect tone for your reception and enjoy the music you love!
Related blog post: The ultimate guide to music for your wedding day
7. Not Paying Vendors in Full Ahead of Time
Some couples regretted having to deal with vendor payments on their wedding day. Handling money during the event can be stressful and distracting. Here’s how to avoid this regret:
Tips to Avoid Payment Stress:
- Pay in advance: Whenever possible, pay all vendors before the wedding day. This way, you can focus on enjoying the event.
- Delegate the task: If a vendor needs payment the day of, assign someone (like a parent or wedding party member) to handle it for you.
- Communicate with vendors: Confirm payment details ahead of time. Make sure you know when and how payments are expected.
- Use a credit card: If needed, give your card to a trusted person so they can pay vendors as required.
- Set reminders: Make sure to check off all payments in your wedding planning checklist to avoid last-minute confusion.
By handling payments early, you can relax and enjoy your day without worrying about money!
8. Worrying Too Much About Small Details
Many couples regret stressing over small details that didn’t matter in the end. Guests often won’t notice the tiny things you worry about. Here’s how to avoid this regret:
Tips to Let Go of Small Details:
- Focus on what’s important: Prioritize the big things, like your ceremony and guest experience. The small stuff is less noticeable.
- Trust your vendors: Let your vendors handle the details…they’re professionals and know how to make things work smoothly.
- Avoid last-minute changes: Stick to your plan instead of making small tweaks at the last minute. It will reduce stress.
- Delegate tasks: Ask friends or family to handle small details so you don’t have to worry about them.
- Remember why you’re there: At the end of the day, the most important things are celebrating your marriage and having a fun party. Don’t let tiny details distract you from that.
By focusing on the bigger picture, you’ll enjoy your wedding day more and worry less about small things!
9. Not Planning Transportation
Some couples regret not organizing transportation ahead of time. Without a plan, it can lead to delays and confusion on the wedding day. Here’s how to avoid this regret:
Tips to Plan Transportation:
- Arrange rides in advance: Whether it’s a shuttle, Uber, or a friend’s car, make sure transportation is planned ahead of time.
- Assign a driver: If anyone in the wedding party is drinking, make sure someone sober is responsible for driving.
- Consider vehicle size: Ensure the cars or shuttles are big enough for everyone, including dresses, bags, and DIY items that you need to take with you after the reception.
- Create a transportation schedule: Write down when and how people are getting from place to place, and share it with your wedding party.
- Have a backup plan: If there are any last-minute issues, know who to call or have a ride-sharing app ready to go.
By planning transportation ahead of time, you’ll avoid confusion and keep your day running smoothly!
10. Having Too Much Downtime Between Dinner and Dancing
Some couples regretted having too much time between dinner and starting the dance party. Long gaps can leave guests bored or restless (As a wedding photographer, I see this one often). Here’s how to avoid this regret:
Tips to Keep Guests Entertained Between Dinner and Dancing:
- Start toasts or speeches towards the end of dinner: Use this time to keep guests engaged while dinner is winding down.
- Plan an activity: Set up a fun activity like a photo booth or trivia game to keep guests entertained during the transition.
- Open the dance floor sooner: As dinner starts wrapping up, have your DJ play some music that is appropriate for kids and older people to dance to. Save the club hits for later on after the dance floor officially opens.
- Involve the crowd: Consider a shoe game or a couple’s trivia game where the newlyweds answer questions in front of guests. It’s fun and helps pass the time.
By planning fun activities and starting the dancing earlier, you’ll keep the energy up and avoid guests feeling bored!
Related blog post: A guide to making your wedding reception timeline
11. Not Including Alone Time with Your Partner
Many couples regret not having any private time with their new spouse on the wedding day. The day can be busy and overwhelming, so it’s important to plan for a few quiet moments together. Here’s how to avoid this regret:
Tips to Make Time for Each Other:
- Plan a break after the ceremony: Take 10-15 minutes alone after the ceremony to relax and enjoy a private moment (this is easier to do if you do a first look and take care of most of the posed photos before the ceremony).
- Sneak away right after photos: Use a quiet spot near the photo location to have a quick break together before lining up for the reception).
- Share a private meal: Some couples choose to eat dinner alone before joining their guests, giving them a chance to connect.
- Go for a sunset walk: Step away from the reception to take sunset photos and enjoy a quiet moment together (As a wedding photographer I recommend this to all my couples. I tell them to put 15 minutes in the schedule for sunset pictures…but then give them the last 5 minutes to just have some alone time as I head back into the reception).
- Communicate with your coordinator: Let your coordinator know you want a few moments of alone time so they can build it into your schedule.
By carving out some time for just the two of you, you’ll create special memories and stay connected on your wedding day!
12. Not Having Someone Record Key Moments
Many couples regretted not recording special moments like the first dance, wedding speeches, and parent dances. Even if you can’t afford a professional videographer, you can still capture these memories. Here’s how to avoid this regret:
Tips to Ensure Key Moments Are Recorded:
- Ask a friend or family member: Designate someone to record important moments on their phone, like your first dance and speeches.
- Use multiple devices: Ask a few guests to record from different angles, so you have backup footage and various perspectives.
- Test the setup ahead of time: Make sure the person recording knows how to use their phone’s video function and has enough storage space.
- Capture the essentials: Focus on recording the most important parts, like the first dance, speeches, and parent dances, so you don’t miss these memories.
- Consider a tripod: If possible, set up a phone on a tripod to ensure steady, high-quality footage.
By planning ahead and asking someone to help, you can capture these key moments even without a professional videographer!
Note: My wife and I could not afford a videographer so we borrowed a small video camera (this was before phone cameras were so good) and had my brother-in-law record a few special things like the first dance and parent dances.
He also walked around and had guests give a special message on video. It was perfect and cost us $0.
13. Not Dancing Enough
Many brides regretted not spending enough time on the dance floor. The reception can get busy, and it’s easy to miss out on dancing. Here’s how to avoid this regret:
Tips to Get More Dance Time:
- Make dancing a priority: Plan your timeline to give you plenty of time on the dance floor.
- Join the dance floor early: Start dancing as soon as the music begins. This sets the tone for the rest of the night.
- Ask your DJ to help: Let the DJ know dancing is important to you, and they can encourage guests to join in and keep things lively.
- Have a friend keep you moving: Ask a bridesmaid or family member to pull you back to the dance floor if you get caught chatting too long.
By making time to dance, you’ll have more fun and enjoy the celebration with your guests!
14. Not Taking a Moment to Soak It All In
Some couples regretted not taking a minute to appreciate their wedding day and said it flew by in what felt like a few hours. With so much happening, it’s easy to miss those special moments. Here’s how to avoid this regret:
Tips to Soak in the Moment:
- Pause after the ceremony: Take a moment with your spouse to look around and appreciate the moment.
- Plan intentional pauses: Schedule time in your timeline to stop, breathe, and take in the surroundings, like during sunset photos or a quiet break.
- Be mindful during key moments: During the ceremony or speeches, take a mental snapshot and appreciate what’s happening.
- Ask your coordinator to help: Let your day-of coordinator or a trusted friend remind you to pause and enjoy the day.
- Focus on the present: Avoid worrying about small details, and focus on being present in the moment.
By taking time to pause and reflect, you’ll create lasting memories and enjoy your wedding day even more!
Final Thoughts
This blog post was not meant to make you worry or stress you out. I have photographed over 500 weddings so I have a lot of experience with what couples enjoy and what they wish they would’ve done differently.
The best way to limit regrets after the wedding say is to sit down with your partner before the wedding and make a list of what’s important and what’s not so important.
Take the most important things from your list and make sure that they find a place in your timeline and wedding day schedule.
Remember…no regrets.
Additional Wedding Planning Tips and Ideas
Here are a few more blog posts that you might find helpful during the wedding planning process:
